Buy Yourself The Damn Flowers | ZBW

Stop waiting for someone else to give you permission to feel beautiful, loved, or worthy. You don’t need a date, a relationship, or some perfect moment to start treating yourself the way you deserve to be treated. Buy yourself the damn flowers. Don’t only pour effort into yourself when someone else is watching. Don’t wait until you have a reason — an event, a meeting, a night out — to care for your appearance or your energy. If making yourself feel pretty makes you feel good, then do it for you because you are worth that effort, with or without anyone else in the picture. Love isn’t just something you give to other people. It starts with you. Treat yourself like someone you love. Speak to yourself kindly. Show up for yourself the way you would for a best friend or partner. Romanticize your own life. Water your own garden. Become someone you’d be excited to spend the rest of your life with — because you are spending your whole life with you. Your energy, your thoughts, your beliefs — they shape the world around you. If you constantly treat yourself as a second choice, you will keep attracting people and situations that reflect that back to you. You attract what you believe you deserve.

So ask yourself:

• Want someone who shows up for you? Start by showing up for yourself.

• Want someone to spoil you? Learn to spoil yourself without guilt.

• Craving compliments and reassurance? Speak those words to the mirror — out loud.

• Dream of stability, ambition, and abundance? Become the source of it in your own life first.

The love you’re seeking isn’t something you wait for — it’s something you embody.

You can't neglect your needs and boundaries and then feel surprised when others do the same. You can’t disrespect your own time, energy, or heart, and then wonder why others walk all over it. Life is always reflecting you back to you. If you want better, be better — not for approval, but because you are worthy of the life you're dreaming of.

Be unapologetically you. Stop performing. Stop shape-shifting into who you think people want you to be. The world doesn’t need another version of someone else — it needs you, as you are. Be who you really are — not who you were taught to be to earn love or safety. If you’re sweet and soft, be sweet and soft. If you’re bold and tough, be bold and tough. Every energy has its space. You don’t need to dilute or amplify yourself to fit in. Not everyone will be for you, and that’s okay — the right people will find you when you're being your realest self.

Authenticity attracts authenticity. Pretending only invites pretense. If you show up as someone else, you'll attract people who are doing the same — and then wonder why the connection feels hollow. Let your truth be loud. Let your presence be real. That’s how you call in the right love, the right friendships, the right everything. Choose yourself every time. Stop giving people the power to make you feel small. Know when to walk away. If someone or something makes you question your worth — whether it’s a relationship, a friendship, a job, or a toxic situation — love yourself enough to say, “This isn’t for me.” Choose peace over chaos. Choose yourself over proving your value to people who can’t see it.

If you keep asking, “Why doesn’t anyone love me?” — pause. Do you love you? If you wonder, “Why doesn’t anyone respect me?” — ask yourself honestly: Do I respect myself?

Because that’s where it starts. You teach people how to treat you by how you treat yourself.

The longer you stay in places that hurt your soul, the more you confirm that pain is what you’re willing to accept. You don’t have to. You can walk away. You can start over. You can choose again. What's meant for you will not pass you by. Real love won’t be lost because you set a boundary or spoke your truth. If you have to betray yourself to keep something, that thing was never truly yours. Become what you want to receive. 

You don’t need to chase anything. You need to become it.

You want love? Be loving. You want stability? Build it. You want beauty, success, wealth, peace? Embody that energy. The key to having it all is realizing you already have everything you need within you.

If you woke up tomorrow with your dream life — would you know how to maintain it? If not, start practicing now. Show up today like you’re already living the life you desire. Start becoming the version of you who already has it.

Buy yourself the damn flowers. Not because no one else will — but because you deserve beautiful things, now. You deserve love, care, softness, safety — and you don’t need to wait for someone else to bring it to you. Be that person for yourself first.

Be yourself. Everyone else is already taken.

Much love,

Wren 𓅫

Founder, Zen by Wren